when i was in my larval stage
before I knew the word “misogyny”
i asked my diary why God
put the dreams of a great man
into the body of a small girl
who had neither the strength nor the intelligence
to achieve them.
and i was so, so smart,
and i was so, so strong.
I’m sorry for the time I spent looking for your flaws
when all I ever needed was to bask in your glory.
I’m sorry it took me so long to understand that there is
enough special to go around.
That, in fact, every last one of us is a motherfucking masterpiece.
That we’re sequoias – mighty, heavy and sprawling with interlocking roots
such that when one of us is nourished
we all grow strong.
I’m sorry I didn’t know that pain is not a contest.
That there has been enough of that to go around.
That it’s not the severity of the wound that makes it important.
It’s the mere fact that you are wounded, and you are important.
And that when we all tend gently to your hurt
it teaches me that all my own little pain-filled places
are also worthy of love.
I’m sorry I didn’t see the lies in the stories I was told
about ugly stepsisters and evil cheerleaders.
I’m sorry I thought you had to lose for me to win.
To all of you young ones who dare to know your power,
I’m sorry for pushing onto you the judgment I was served.
To all of you vibrant ones whose magic I begrudged,
You see, I believed a lie that I didn’t have enough of my own.
Ha. We are dripping in it. Drowning in it.
As many shades and textures of it as there are sisters.